SEAMUS.

[1:45: James] i’m NOT BLIND
[1:45: James] BUT. they’re in the toilet!!
[1:46: James] james help what do i do??

[1:47PM: seamus] take em out of there man
[1:47PM: seamus] then try and clean em obviously
[1:48PM: seamus] make sure there ain’t no piss on em
[1:48PM: seamus] cus that’d be bad

BUTTHOLE.

               Leaning completely back in his own chair, he covered his face
               with both hands. His laughter sounded a lot like he was crying
               —- or more like his crying sounded like his laughter. Cracking
               his russet eyes open, his smile spread across his entire face. 

     ❝ You- You have fucking JORDAN’S luck ! ❞

                   James hesitantly clicked off of the atrocity and instead went to open
                   another case, his breathing heavy as he rested his chin on his hand.
                   It was actually Jordan’s fault all this had happened in the first place,
                   and James could not see himself forgiving him any time soon.

                              ❝ Jordan doesn’t deserve the knives he gets, Aleks. He sits
                              there on his HIGH HORSE reprimanding ME for getting put through
                              all this bullshit —- I’ll show him, Aleksandr. ❞

MOOSE.

          ❝ No but I mean seriously —- is this a joke? ❞

         ❝ … Seamus. Seamus —- can I just have it now? ❞

content:

  「text: FUCKJ FUCK MY GLASSES FELL INTO THE TOILET」

[1:43PM: seamus] HAHAHAHA
[1:44PM: seamus] wait
[1:44PM: seamus] are you okay holy shit?? CAN YOU SEE

MOOSE.

           ❝ James, are you kidding me? ❞

         ❝ Am I kidding YOU? Are YOU kidding ME? ❞

MOOSE.

              ❝ Really? I thought that was the best part? And no,
              goddamnit, I said I was borrowing it for something
              until you came all up in here interrupting me. ❞

               ❝ Oh, well I am terribly sorry for interrupting whatever
               probey-probe bullshit you’ve got going on in here. Please
               —- do not let me stop you. ❞

MOOSE.

           ❝ Yes, that’s exactly what I’m using it for. You got that exactly right.
           I get a big banana the first thing I wanna do is shove it up my ass –
           you got me there, James. ❞

         ❝ Can I have the fucking thing back or not? It
         better not have your shit on it either. ❞

content:

  「text: i like to squish them」

[05:11AM] ze: i can absolutely relate to that
[05:11AM] ze: but then again who doesn’t B)

BUTTHOLE.

               Due to Aleks’ fit of laughter, he found that stopping was
               nearly impossible. Though, as James slammed his FIST
               down upon the desk, the younger jumped at the sudden noise
               but only began to laugh HARDER.

      ❝ Y-Yes ! You’re so f..fucking stupid ! ❞

              All James could do at this point was wheeze for an extended amount
              of time before slapping his hands across his face, rocking backward
              and forward a little in his seat. He then sat back, taking in the disaster
              before him once again as he listened to the other practically suffocate
              next to him. He shook the mouse a little as he hovered it over the knife,
              only to see that it was– just his luck– well-worn.

                       ❝ FUCK! Gabe– Gabe please! Don’t do this to me! ❞

STEFANI.

❝ Hmm..has anyone ever pranked you? I mean, it seems likely that someone would want revenge. ❞

               { she gave a small roll of her shoulders, setting up the camera as she had seen the others do many times, trying her best to remember how. she managed to get it ready, whenever he was. }

         ❝ Stefani—- you’ve been here long enough to know that near
         enough everyone in this office is absolute shit at that sort of
         stuff. Like, remember the fart spray incident? Fair enough I
         was apart of that but those guys were bringing me down. ❞

                    As soon as he saw that Stefani was ready, he gave her a small
                    nod before beginning to make his way down to Jordan’s office.
                    He appeared to be in the middle of a recording session, which
                    actually made things a lot easier seeing as though he’d probably
                    be distracted.